Ok, I was wrong...

I'll admit it now. While in college, I was an avid admirer of Ayn Rand. I devoured The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged. I was a believer, certain that the builders and producers should rule over the parasites and users.

Of course, it being the 1960s, I also believed that the bomb should not be used, marched for civil rights against Ole Miss, attended the very first Vietnam teach-in at Rutgers, and was very present at anti-war rallies and the very first (and second and third...Etc.) Earth Days.

Then I grew up. Years later, I re-read Ayn Rand and discovered two important things: she was an absolutely terrible, horrible writer and her ideas did not make any sense at all in the real world.

If only some of our leaders and shakers had learned the same lesson as they grew up, too.

The Infantilization of "Gourmet" Food

Lobster mac and cheese. 5 napkin Burgers. Heavy burgers. Kobe Meatloaf. Pizza bistros. More pizza bistros. More burger joints. And more mac 'n' cheese.

That's what I am reading about in the restaurant and foodie columns. With the exception of chicken fingers and chicken nuggets, it all seems to read like a kids' menu, only with pricier ingredients and pricier prices.

Whatever happened to real food, the kind that demanded a knife, fork and teeth so you could chew it? Is it because people want to be younger -- and thus eat kiddy food? It can't be all about price, as some of these burger joints start around $12 and go upward rapidly.

Maybe it's the economy. During the "great" depression, people flocked to the movies to see happy-making, escape-from-reality films. Could this time it be all about back-to-childhood comfort foods?

Sure, it's fun to be ale to eat with your hands -- and that includes pizza for true believers -- pizza should never be eaten with a knife and fork -- take that, Donald Trump! But let's not take it too far.

Bring back adult food -- with more than one course, and real utensils and cloth napkins. And maybe candles. And a tablecloth. And wine. Not every day. But once in a while, and pass by the burgers and fries and pizza and mac 'n' cheese. Please. And not from food trucks.

The Black Friday Antidote -- Don't Shop

As usual, we are being bombarded with ads and news stories about Black Friday sales, opening hours, camping out to get there first, etc. It started a week or so before Halloween, and has only intensified since then.
In fact, I was in Chico's  last week, trying to replace a pair of trousers before they were all out of my size, and the music being played was "Let it snow." In Miami. Around 88 degrees out. The week before Thanksgiving.
I know it is vital for retailers to make it out of the red during this season, but it is becoming ridiculous. Luckily, I rarely buy much at this time of the year. I work online, so no holiday office parties and gift exchanges. No grandchildren, either. We do not celebrate Christmas, and no Chanukah presents/toys needed for grown children and pets. A trip to the Sprint store to finally get our iPhones will suffice.
My answer to the Black Friday madness? Ignore it. I don't need marked-down electronics, toys, games, sweaters, mittens or hats. Do you really?

Who's asking?

During the past several weeks, I have been bombarded by charities, political parties, candidates and causes all asking for one thing: money.

Please give as little as $3...$5...$75. Please come to our charitable event...Only $150...$200...$300...$500 per ticket. Please become my sponsor as I walk(run, bike) to cure (support, raise awareness) for (disease, cause).

Yes, I will sign your petition. I will Occupy Miami. I will volunteer. But -- as interest rates continue to decline -- stop asking me for money. It has already been designated for causes dearer to me.

Que Hora Es?

After living in Miami for about six years, mi marido and I have finally bitten the bullet, and are in the middle to taking an Introduction to Spanish Conversation course through one of the local colleges.

Ten of us sit around a table and, under the auspices of our Profesora, attempt not to mangle el idioma Espanol. It is not easy. Many years back, I took more years than I could imagine of French. In French, you pronounce very little, often leaving off half of each word. In Spanish, you pronounce everything. I sincerely doubt I will ever master the trilling "r".

We've now moved past the "how are you?"and "my name is" section of the course, and are into verbs, pronouns and declensions. Only in the present tense, mind you. And only regular verbs. I shudder to think of the irregular ones.

Whenever our Profesora  asks us to answer a question, you see the "deer in the headlights" look appear on the face of the chosen student. She is always very helpful when we stumble through the answer, but there is still fear. And remember, we all chose to take this course. It is not required.

To get an idea of how we all sound, check this out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4cKGyOE_jOI --it was sent by one of the other students.


And always remember -- que hora es? Ocho!

American Airlines comes through ...sort of.

To our intense surprise, AA actually answered our letter,  as follows:

September 14, 2011 

Dear Mr. Bodner: 

Thank you for contacting Customer Relations.  We received your letter and were eager to send you a reply as quickly as possible. ( just two weeks later)

Accordingly, I obtained the email address you provided for your AAdvantage® membership profile and have taken the liberty of responding to you electronically.  After reading your comments, we are very disappointed to hear that we let you down. It must have been frustrating when your flight encountered mechanical problems resulting in multiple delays. (Our flight didn't have mechanical problems -- the previous one did.)

 There is no question that both of you were inconvenienced.  At the same time, we very much appreciate your honest feedback.  Your comments represent areas of our service that receive our continual review and we are renewing our focus on these very key service areas.  The details you provided give us an opportunity to improve and you have our pledge that we are working hard to make your next overall travel experience with us the best that it can be.  

While on-time performance is a top priority at American, the many uncontrollable factors associated with air travel make some delays and cancellations inevitable.  For this reason, and in keeping with airline industry practices, we cannot assume financial responsibility for our customers' personal time lost or for out-of-pocket expenses incurred as a result of operational difficulties. (According to the brochure we received, they are. At least for some of them.)

 Nevertheless, we should always do everything possible to make such situations a little less frustrating.  As a gesture of goodwill, we have added 15,000 bonus miles to each of your AAdvantage® accounts. (We asked for 25,000.) These adjustments will be reflected in your account very soon. 

Mr. Bodner, again, thank you for keeping us informed.  We look forward to the privilege of welcoming you and your wife aboard American Airlines very soon.  

Sincerely,

(Name Withheld)

Customer Relations

American Airlines

Good boilerplate, albeit it didn't answer our problem. But better than an unusable voucher.

It does help to write letters of complaint to the people who can do something, rather than just bitch to your friends and acquaintances.  And sometimes you even get some of what you you requested.

Experienced Professional Genius Wanted -- Really Low Pay!

I often peruse Craigslist to check out the jobs posted under Writing/Editing and Marketing/PR/Adv. and am often amazed at what they ask for for 2 cents a word or $15 an hour.

More than 30 years ago, I used to freelance product blurbs for a fashion catalogue. I was paid $25 a blurb, and was able to dash out at least two per hour, often more. I averaged around $60 an hour, and that was before computers made it easy to cut and paste and send. I actually had to make copies and mail my work in.

Of course, I also wrote ads and mailers, as well as scripts, billboards, etc.  paying much, much more.

Now, companies want an experienced professional, proficient in a variety of graphic and web-based programs, preferably with agency experience and bilingual --for maybe $25 an hour -- at their office.

This makes me very glad I no longer have to have a job.

All the lonely people

On Sunday, I attended what could be called the concert from Hell. Not because of the performers. They were more than adequate, even quite entertaining. Because of the audience.

Unfortunately, we picked the wrong seats. In front of us was  gaggle of pre- or almost teeners. They whispered, changed seats and texted continuously from the first note.Then one of them had a meltdown, and the entire group got up,left, returned, got up again, left, returned...  The adult with them at first ignored the entire situation, then got up, left, returned, got up,left, returned...

Behind us was a gang of women who chatted loudly in Spanish and English, but calmd down a little when the music started.

But wait ( as the ads always say)-- there's more:

Many of the audience acted as if they were at an outdoor  concert (they weren't) or in their own living room. They stood up, walked to the door down the center aisle, opened the doors, chatted, texted, then returned. Numerous times,

Two men stood at the right side and talked throughout the concert, oblivious to those  around them. Others chatted, texted, moved around, and generally ignored the fact they were in an audience. Or that other people were there, around them.

At least two photographers with big lenses and flashes walked around, took multiple shots from the front, sides and center aisle, blocking the view and (I assume) annoying the performers.

I can almost understand the pre-teeners. Their parents simply haven't taught them outside manners.
But the adults should know better.

Our cellphones and other devices supposedly have made us more inter-connected. If this is an example, they have, instead, made us more alienated from each other, unable to become part of a shared experience, incapable of knowing how to act as a member of a group.

It's sad.

My Letter to Ameican Airlines

Our vacation cruise was wonderful, but the return home was even more memorable. Below is the letter we sent to AA.I'll keep you all posted on AA's response, if any.

American Airlines Customer Relations P.O. Box 619612 MD 2400 DFW Airport, TX 75261-9612

Dear Sir or Madam:

While we have often travelled on American Airlines, usually without too many problems, my latest trip – Flights 111 and 2378 on August 26, 2011 from Rome to Chicago to Miami – was a major fiasco.

We left our cruise ship at 7:15 am to get to the airport three hours before departure for Flight 111, which was to leave at 11:30 am. When we arrived and checked in, we were told our flight would be delayed until 2:30 pm because of late incoming aircraft.  Since the flight would arrive long after our connection was to take off at 4:50 pm, we asked for boarding passes for a later connection, but were told they were not authorized to do that, and we would have to do it in Chicago. We were issued boarding passes for the connection we were certain to miss, but were told our luggage would be checked through to Miami.

We asked several others who were waiting for the flight if they had been notified of the delay. None had and none were issued new ongoing connections.

We then asked again at the gate if we could get new boarding passes for a later connecting flight. Again, we were told it was impossible. We were told, however, that there was an 8 pm connecting flight we could make and, if we missed that, another at midnight.

Since we knew we would not receive anything to eat until late afternoon, early evening, we purchased lunch at the airport at a cost of 28 Euros (US$42).

When our flight finally took off – at least another half-hour late, we asked several flight attendants if the pilot could call ahead and make certain we and other connecting passengers would be expedited. We were then told that the connecting Flight was at 7 pm, not 8, and that the problem with boarding passes was because AA had contracted the service out.  This is not an excuse passengers should hear.

When we finally arrived in Chicago, we quickly went through customs and immigration, but there was nobody to expedite the transfer. We found someone to recheck our bags, then ran to the next terminal.

When we arrived, panting, we were refused boarding passes because it was "too late." Had we already had those passes, we could have made the flight.

The next flight to Miami was not at midnight, but at 5:40 am the next morning. We asked for a supervisor and requested a hotel room, dinner, breakfast, and an upgrade. The first thing the supervisor told us was that we were not getting an upgrade.

The second thing was that the entire episode was caused because AA had contracted out their service in Rome and it wasn't their fault. Again, a problem for the company that should not be passed on to customers.

We finally arrived in Miami a day late, exhausted, and upset. Our baggage, by the way, made the 7PM flight the night before.

In light of these circumstances, we would like AA to reimburse us for our lunch in Rome  (receipt copy attached) and think that, at the very least, we should receive 25,000 frequent flyer miles each (accounts KT69642 for Nathan Bodner and 2A49K72 for Meryl Bodner). This would do much to calm us down and reassure us that American Airlines stands up for its customers.

We eagerly await your rapid reply regarding this matter.

NATHAN BODNER

MERYL BODNER

The encroachment of rudeness

I remember when you went to a meeting with (maybe) a pad and pen and listened carefully or not so carefully, taking notes and/or doodling.

Today, you go to a meeting and the first thing everyone does is put his or her smart phone/blackberry/android or whatever on the table and checks emails, posts on Facebook, calls friends, texts, tweets and pays little to no attention to the presenter, agenda or matters at hand.

My mother would think this rude. So do I.

And while this is rude at meetings, it is even ruder at social occasions. I remember being in a restaurant several years ago.  Four women were meeting for lunch. Or so I thought. Unfortunately, three of them were speaking on their cell phones to people who were not there. Nobody was talking to the people whom they ostensibly were meeting for lunch.

This makes no sense. People who are there with you should take precedence over people who are not. Unless you are an EMT or surgeon on call or an attorney awaiting the jury's return, there is no reason to answer your phone or even give it the place of honor at the table.

Until androids truly take over the world, let's put real people first.

I am not technology averse, but no smart phone could replace a real friend. So keep the phones in your pocket or purse, and pay attention to the people you're with. It's the courteous thing to do.

When did underwear become outerwear?

I remember when, back in the day, showing even the tiniest bit of a bra strap was a cause for extreme embarrassment. Our 7th grade French teacher would adjust her strap (under her shirt, of course) and cause titters from the boys and blushes from the girls.

Today, underwear is out everywhere. Not just straps but the entire back and sides of bras -- not just peeking out from tank tops but out there on their own.

This works (kind of) on toned bodies, but is seen most often on the pudgy ones. You know, the ones with love handles bigger than your head. Or a breadbox. People of Walmart types.

As for boxers and briefs-- please pull up your pants, boys. You can't even cross the street without holding up your pants. Gangsta' chic?  Not really.

While I certainly don't believe in head to toe coverups, burqa-style, a modicum of cover would be nice. It's called underwear for a reason -- because you're supposed to wear it under your clothing, not instead of.

Mattress World

As I drive up or down Biscayne Boulevard, I am always amazed at the number of mattress stores that inhabit the area. There's one every two blocks or so. MattressFirm. Zmattress. And so on.

Then there are the department and home furnishing stores that also have huge mattress sales.

My question: who buys all those mattresses? A good mattress lasts 15-20 years. Most homes have two to four mattresses. How often do you need to buy one?

Maybe those stores are fronts for betting parlors or even money laundering.

Otherwise, why so many?

Think about it.

First steps

I think many of us worry about the day we become our mothers.
Initially, you find yourself mouthing the same phrases:
Because I say so, that's why.
If everyone else....
I don't care if your friends' parents said it was OK..

And so forth.

Then, we begin to worry we share the same prejudices:

How could anyone wear that outfit?
Haven't they ever heard of proofreading?

And so forth.

Then, as we grow older, we finally realize it is OK to be curmudgeonly.
Actually, it's FUN.


But only as long as we don't actually sound just like our Mother.

So, here goes -- a sharing of rants and raves -- from the computer of a woman who's old enough to know better, but really doesn't care.